Dave Alpert: I Know Where You’re Going with That

I rarely speed.  It’s not that I’m particularly law abiding or that I’m intentionally conserving fossil fuels.  It’s partially that  I know the extra 10 mph won’t make much of a difference in my drive time.  But, mostly, it’s that as a freelance writer, I am constantly broke.  So, I can’t afford a moving violation (or even a parking ticket for that matter).  Now, because I do drive the speed limit, I am keenly aware of all the super agressive driving around me.  At times, I’m even the victim of that agression.  So, I wasn’t surprised when a guy came whipping up behind me in the slow lane on Soldier’s Field Road, made an aggressive move to get around me, shot me a dirty look and then sped far ahead.  However, I was a little surprised and particularly amused that the guy was driving a Toyota Prius.

It would seem to me that the main reason people buy hybrid cars is for the better gas mileage.  The reasons people want better gas mileage is to reduce their “carbon footprint” and cut costs.  Many of my composting, recycling, solar panel owning, MASSPIRG volunteering friends drive them.  Anyway, it got me thinking about whether an aggressive hybrid driver is more damaging to the environment than a non-aggressive driver of a regular car–thus my amusement.

 VS
Ford Focus                                                                  Toyota Prius

After researching a little bit, I was delighted to find this Edmunds article discussing fuel efficiency.  According to their test results, non-aggressive drivers save 31% on milieage on average; non-speeders save an additional 12%.  So, the Prius guy that slammed on his brakes, whipped around me and then stepped on the gas again potentially burns over 40% more fuel while only saving about 20% due to the environment friendliness of his car.  Thus, the guy may still burn 20% more fuel than a guy with a regular old Ford Focus or something. 

The author of the article even mentions hybrids in discussing the results:

Our tests showed that the most significant way to save gas is: you. And we’re talking massive fuel economy gains. Think you need a hybrid? Chances are you’ve got hybrid-style mileage in your gas pedal foot.

Attention Mr. Fancypants Prius driver: Greenpeace wants their membership card back!

Scene: Chris and Dave finish a song and a large Irishman approaches the stage with a piece of paper.

Irishman: Can you play the Plains of Kildare?

Chris: No.

Irishman: But this is an Irish bar.

Chris: But I’m Itailan and he’s Jewish.

Scene: Irishman rolls his eyes and walks away

Dave (in mic): An Italian and a Jew playing at an Irish bar… TROUBLE!

Scene: Dave and Chris play A New England by Billy Bragg

THE END 

Upcoming
The next chance to heckle this dynamic duo will be the first 3 Sundays in December at Toad in Cambridge, MA.  We’ll be playing with the full band, including Chuck Vath filling in on bass and backing vocals.  All shows begin at 8pm, right after Sunday Spins. No cover.  So, come early, spin some vinyl and hear us ROCK!

On Saturday, we played another rocking show with our friends–The Organ Beats, Gretel and Tommy Dempsey.  Thanks to everyone who came out and made it a really fun time and a great hang.  Here are some photos for your viewing pleasure.

Dave Alpert (aka me) backed up by Rob, Mark and Joe

Joe Klompus filling in ON HIS BIRTHDAY!!!

Reva Williams from Gretel sitting in on backing vocals

Rob wetting his whistle on stage.

Reva drinking on stage, seems to be a common theme.

Mark Purrington–our go-to guy when Shuffles can’t make the gig. ROCK!!!

this band rocks!

Come check us out in December at TOAD in Porter Sq.  We’re playing every Sunday (except the 27th) at 8pm with special guests performers and bands.  Come early with your favorite vinyl for Sunday Spins (3:30pm-7pm), and be primed and ready by the time we hit the stage.  Oh, and at TOAD, there is NEVER A COVER–EVER!!! 

Calling all Boston-area music lovers… This is going to be a great night of music with The Organ Beats, Gretel, Tommy Dempsey and Dave Alpert!

Saturday, November 14th, 9pm
Club Bohemia (Cantab Lounge downstairs)
21+. Tickets $8

Lineup:

9pm - Tommy Dempsey

10pm - Gretel

11pm - Dave Alpert

Midnight - The Organ Beats

Question: when does a constuction site warrant a porta-potty?

Answer: apparently this one does…

As I was walking through the parking lot in Coolidge Corner, Brookline, I noticed this little patch of sidewalk being worked on.  It was the width of 3 parking spaces.  I noticed the porta-potty and wondered whether this site was worthy of its own bathroom.  Obviously, on a large construction site, it makes sense to have portable bathrooms so the workers don’t have to leave the site to go potty.  But in Coolidge Corner, wouldn’t it just be more cost efficienct to have them go into Panera Bread or Starbucks (like everyone else)?!

Earlier today, I discovered this gem of a billboard ad on my way home from the Arsenal Mall in Watertown, MA:

It’s awesome.  I couldn’t have said it better myself.  In fact, I think my friends should all donate their pets to medical science.  It constantly amazes me how passionate people are about animals. We eat them; we keep them as pets; we feed them to other animals; take them from their natural habitat; displace them; hunt them; and we kill them.  Still, people claim to love them. 

Actually, my favorite kind of people are pet owning vegetarians.  “I won’t eat one or kill one, but I’ll make one live in my house, eat from a plastic bowl, and walk around with a collar around its neck.  Awesome.  You are so close to having a point! 

I understand the arguments: we’ve been doing it for ages.  Dogs have been domesticated since 15,000 bc and cats since about 7,500 bc.  They rely on humans. And they “love us”.  Here’s my favorite: “my pet is like a member of the family”.  You see.  I’ll tell you another human tradition that reaches back thousands of years: SLAVERY.  And just because we’ve been doing it since the beginning of time, doesn’t make it right.  Freedom is freedom.  I think that encouraging the breeding of species of animals because they are hardcoded to “not be free” is no excuse.  According to the wikipedia article, “Greek philosophers such as Aristotle accepted the theory of natural slavery, that is, that some men are slaves by nature.”  Sounds pretty much the same to me.

So, what do you say?  Do the world of favor.  Let’s make a commitment to free the world of domesticated animals.  I understand: if you just free them, they’ll die.  So, you might as well free them at the doorstep of an animal research lab.   

FREEDOM!  FREEDOM!  FREEDOM!!!